A Mother's Prayer

As we often do, Jackson & I were rocking together this morning and singing along to some of our favorites on his iPod. We got to the song "A Mother's Prayer" from Carnie Wilson's "Lullabies from the Heart" album. Her words struck a chord and before I could catch myself, there were tears streaming down my face. Tears of joy.

It hit me like a ton of bricks. Here I was, rocking and singing with my sweet baby in my arms. Something I have dreamt about for what seems like my whole life. During my pregnancy, I read books and sang songs in that very chair nearly every night as my belly grew and I anticipated his arrival. I couldn't wait for the moment when that baby was actually in my arms...and now it was here.

It is so much better than I even dreamt it could be. As I was staring at Jackson, sound asleep, breathing deeply, perfectly content with his little arms around me and not a worry in the world, I was just completely taken by the moment. Normally, I move him to bed as soon as he falls asleep in order to get a few things done around the house. Today, I couldn't take my eyes off of him and I couldn't bear to let him go. He truly is a mixture of all the best pieces of Drew & I. Drew's dark complexion, piercing blue eyes and square chin. My nose, mouth and round, chubby cheeks.

He is growing so quickly already. I know my time with him as an infant will be over before I know it. Which is why I didn't rush to put him to bed and instead cherished the entire hour that we rocked in that chair together. I was prepared for parenthood, but I was not prepared for the amount of love that would fill my heart with his very first breath.

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A Mother's Prayer

As I lay you down to sleep, I pray the lord your soul to keep
'Cause I don't need that much for me, this is a mother's prayer

I pray for angels by your side, and ask they watch you day and night
Walk with you all through your life, this is a mother's prayer

I pray that all the dreams you dream come true
And every star you wish upon grants every wish times two
I hope one day you'll get the chance to truly see
What real love is, like you've shown me

As I watch you fast asleep, I close my eyes and pray for peace
'Cause now it means much more to me, this is a mother's prayer

And as you grow and seasons pass, I hope that time won't move too fast
Though it is too much to ask, this is a mother's prayer

I pray that when you give your heart it's true
And all the love you give away comes back to you times two
I hope one day you'll get the chance to truly see
What real love is and what you mean to me

In this great big world you can't stay small forever
'Cause before I know it you'll be grown and standing on your own
But I hope these words are something that you'll treasure
And you get the chance to whisper them to children of your own

I pray that all the dreams you dream come true
And every star you wish upon grants every wish times two
I hope one day you'll get the chance to truly see
What real live is like you've shown me

This is a mother's prayer